30 Things You Will Never Hear a Redneck Say

[ford4x4fun]

30 Things You Will Never Hear a Redneck Say
1. I'll take Shakespeare for $1,000, Alex
2. Duct tape won't fix that
3. Lisa Marie was lucky to catch Michael
4. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken
5. Hey, here's an episode of Hee Haw that we haven't seen
6. You can't feed that to the dog
7. I thought Graceland was tacky
8. No kids in the back of the pick-up, it's not safe
9. Wrasslin's fake
10. Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?
11. We're vegetarians
12. Do you think my hair is too big?
13. Instead of biscuits and gravy, I'll have grapefruit
14. Honey, do the bonsai trees need watering?
15. Who's Richard Petty?
16. No firearms in this house!
17. Deer heads detract from the decor
18. Her shorts should be longer
19. Please trim the fat off my steak
20. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso
21. The tires on that truck are too big
22. I've got it all on a floppy disk
23. Unsweetened tea, please
24. She's too old to be wearing a bikini
25. My fiance, Paula Jo, is registered at Tiffany's
26. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl
27. Wait kids, let's check that nutrition label
28. I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today
29. The first thing I noticed about Dolly Parton was her pretty smile
30. Checkmate

[xxxtina63]

[JWW]

Thanks for the jokes.

[flyboy2610]

#31: Oh, I couldn't. She's only 14.

[RedneckTexan]

Them's the bestest jokes I've heard in awhile thanks for postin ford4x4fun!

flyboy, that's a good one